Remember
by Linhiful
Summary: It was easier to focus her anger on Mako, because that meant that she didn't have to think of the one man that she always thought would be the one constant in her life. A look into Asami during the season finale. Slight hint of Irosami


Disclaimer: I don't own LOK

A/N: The finale left me with a lot of Asami feels, and I just can't... She deserves so much better than what was given to her. I actually cried as I was writing this.

Only a slight hint of Irosami, because I didn't want that to be the focus of the story.

* * *

Asami didn't want to think of her father, not about the man who had pretty much raised her single-handedly. The one who made sure she never went without. The one who taught her how to drive. The one who made sure she knew how to fight. The one who had shaped her to become the person she was today.

She had to swallow down the piece of bile that threatened to well up her throat when she realized that everything he taught her was probably in preparation of one day fighting by his side, supporting the equalist.

She tried not to think of her first day behind the wheel, about how she almost crashed into the side of the factory, and how her father just laughed it off, taking a hold of the side of the wheel with one hand, guiding her along the right path. Asami once believed that he would've always been that man for her. That no matter how many people may cycle through her life; she would always have Hiroshi Sato.

But it was easier to focus her anger on Mako, to channel everything into what was in front of her eyes. Because this was at least something she could try to control. Something that she could try to fix.

So she couldn't hold back the biting remark as they returned, narrowing her eyes as she looked at the two. "You two were gone a while."

And Mako snapped back because even during the short time that they were together, Asami knew that he was the kind of person who could only ever focus on one thing at a time. And right now, Korra was his focus. "We were doing reconnaissance."

But the image of Korra and Mako kissing wouldn't leave her mind. She didn't know who started it, or how it happened, but a rush of scenarios constantly played out through her mind. Maybe it had happened during a training session, a heated battle between the two that had gotten out of hand. A rush of passion that couldn't be stopped. To be quite honest, though, she wasn't sure if she wanted them to stop.

Because if it did she would have to remember the heavy feeling of the equalist glove in her hand. Or the rush of emotions that crashed through her when she stared down at it, feeling the power of electricity that sparked through the glove. She would have to remember the look on her father's face as she shocked him.

"Whatever," she said, both in reply to Mako and the memories that she was desperately trying to forget.

(-)(-)(-)(-)

She head Mako rustling around, throwing off the blanket and walking off. She didn't move from her spot, clutching the blanket close to her as she stared straight ahead at the broken down hut in front of her.

She felt sleep try to pull her back in, it's tempting arms held out for her to dive into its comfort. But that would be when the nightmares would start. When all of her childhood memories would become tainted by what she knew now.

"Can't sleep either?" For a second Asami allowed herself to imagine that he directed those words to her. That he even cared enough to check up on her nowadays. For a second, she almost even answered back.

"It's so crazy, a few months ago I was in the South Pole practicing for my fire bending test, and now I'm in the middle of an all out war."

And for a second Asami allowed herself to imagine what it would be like if Korra had stayed there. Where would her life be now if the Avatar had never dropped into her life? Would she still be lying here in a sewer wishing to have her father back? Would she still have her boyfriend?

Asami shook her head, burying her face into her hands. No. She would rather know the truth. Rather know now than later with the city in complete ruins.

"I know. We didn't even know each other then, and now, I can't imagine my life without you in it. You the most loyal, brave, and selfless person I've ever known."

But Asami allows herself to dream, trying to ignore the burning behind her eyes, the tears that she refused to let escape. She didn't want them to see her shaking shoulders or hear her muffled cries.

"I think you're pretty incredible too, but I think you already knew that."

It was then that Asami knew that it was over.

(-)(-)(-)(-)

"It's time to take down my father." She ignored the stinging in her heart when she said this, the pain much more unbearable now that she had spoken it out loud. She tried to steel herself and replay over and over again that her father was not the man she thought he was.

"Wait," Korra said. And Asami had to watch as Mako brushed past her. As his entire focus rested on Korra.

And she didn't how she had missed their looks before. The gaze that Mako had directed towards Korra was one that she had never seen before. It was one that had never been directed towards her before.

Asami allowed herself another pang of hurt as she rested her gaze on the ground, willing the tears to subside.

But no matter how much she accepted it, not matter how obvious it was, it still didn't prepare her for the next morning as Mako stood in front of her.

"Asami, I'm sorry things got so messed up between us, but whatever happens today, I want you to know how much I care about you.

And for a second she allowed herself to believe that they were still back at the restaurant on their first date, and she was gazing at the cute dorky boy that she had run over on her moped. She allowed herself to remember the carriage ride as she rested her head on his chest, feeling like she was on top of the world.

"I care about you too." And she allowed herself one last kiss on his cheek before she turned her back on him, focusing her gaze on the space between Bolin and Iroh. She held it in until she climbed onto Naga, wrapping her arms around Iroh.

As they took off, he didn't say a word about the tears that soaked through the back of his shirt.

(-)(-)(-)(-)

"Asami, I know I have hurt you, and I am sorry." She awakened to the sound of his voice, and if she was being honest with herself, she could admit that it was the most comforting thing she had heard in a while. But as she moved herself around, her arms tightly tied behind her back, and the words he was speaking hitting her, she knew that it was only an illusion.

"But I believe that one day you will come to your senses and we could be a family again."

Asami sat up and glared at him, not even recognizing the man in front of her. She flashed back to the night in the factory, seeing her father hold down her friends, and knew that it wasn't possiblity anymore.

"Are you insane? How could we be a family after everything you've done? Mom would hate you for what you've become."

"How dare you," he shouted, grabbing hold of the bars. In her entire life, she had never seen her father so angry before, and she knew that she had hit his sore spot. "I am avenging her death."

She was never going to have her father back.

(-)(-)(-)(-)

She was running on pure adrenaline, hand gripping the controls of the equalist machines, channeling her anger into the smashing the airplanes. She had always felt most at home surrounded by the twisting and turning of gears. They gave a satisfying crunch, fire bursting up and she could almost feel the heat through the glass.

"Asami, what do you think you're doing? You're aiding the very people who took your mother away."

But when she looked back on her mother, she only remembered the days they had spend together in happiness. She wanted to remember the nights her mother would spend brushing her hair, or the days they would spend by the racetrack, watching the Satomobiles being tested. Her mother was the one who sparked her love for Satomobiles, feeling the wind rush through her hair for the first time as they raced through the streets.

"You don't feel love for Mom anymore. You're too full of hatred."

She didn't want those memories to be tainted.

"You ungrateful, insolent child."

Her mind went blank as Hiroshi crashed into her, throwing her onto the ground. She stared at the machine that her father had become. "I now see that there is no chance to save you." And his arm went up, like he was punishing her for being an insolent child. Her father had never hit her before.

But Hiroshi Sato has.

Chunks of the earth flew at him, and Asami took this chance to throw him off, electrocuting him before throwing him onto the ground. She stared down at him, prying open the machine and ready to end this once and for all.

But she saw the face of her father, and her grip slackened on the controls, and for a split second, she thought that maybe they would be okay.

But a claw shot itself at her, and she barely had time to move away. "You really are a horrible father." She tightened her grip once more, pressing the button to shoot the rope and watched as it grabbed hold of him, a scream echoing out as it electrocuted him before he lay motionless on the ground.

(-)(-)(-)(-)

She sat on the deck of the ship, her legs swinging off the side as she buried her face into her hands. She could hear the footsteps walking towards her, but she ignored it.

They stopped right behind her, and she could feel the rustle of clothes as they squatted down beside her. "Should you be off attending to Korra?" she snapped turned to face them.

But she didn't meet the gold eyes that she was expecting. "Are you okay?" Iroh asked, leaning back to seat himself more comfortably beside her.

"I'm sorry," she said, turning away from him to look out into the water. "I thought you were someone else."

"Were you hoping that I was Mako?" She shrugged her shoulders, bringing her legs up and hugging herself as she rested her face on her knees.

"I don't even know what I was hoping for." He moved closer to her, holding his hand up as if to wrap his arm around her, but it just hovered in the air for a second before it was back to his side.

"It's okay, you know. To hope." She didn't say anything in reply, just closed her eyes as theystung with unshed tears. Maybe if she just didn't say anything, he would leave and she could cry in peace. "I mean, from what I hear, you've lost just as much as Korra. If not even more."

She looked up at him in shock, the throat closing up as words fail to leave her. "W-What?" He actually put an arm around her this time, pulling her closer to him.

"I think you've already know, but my shoulder is a good place to cry on." The dam broke, and she couldn't hold back her tears any longer, a sob escaping her throat as she wrapped her arms around his neck and cried into his chest. He didn't say a word, just soothingly rubbed her back as she stained his shirt with her makeup and tears.


End file.
